Thursday, September 30, 2010

Morning Blorg, Nefarious Fruit Edition

Turns out the stuxnet worm's code may have biblical allusions. Or not. It seems that a section of code is named 'myrtus' which may be linked to myrtle which is a plant which may be linked to Esther who was a lady who was in a book which was in the bible which was about the Hebrews avoiding a dastardly plot by the Persians.

It's the Israelis! It's the Israelis! It's the Israelis!

Well. Quite possibly. But this seems like a ridiculous way of going about figuring out who wrote this code. This may be the first time in history, an Old Testament scholar was brought in for an interview about computer virus code. Best meaningless line to back up the article:

The guava fruit is part of the Myrtus family, and one of the code modules is identified as Guava.

Ah yes....the deadly guava....it's all coming together now.

Nintendo hates your children and wants to ruin their Christmas.

Hopefully, this means police will start wearing cardigans. All. The. Time. Forevers.

As it turns out, humans may be able to learn something about democracy from bees. I know! Weird! But what do I take away from this piece? Nonstop dance party!!!!

A possibly habitable planet, that would be a profoundly unpleasant place to live. Please try harder Science! And while you're on it, I'm still waiting for my deathray....Just sayin'.

I hate airports. I hate them so much. So very, very much. My views on flying are: You're consumed by security, digested in the waiting area and then crapped out in a flying, silver turd to somewhere. Hateful, hateful flying. And I get to do it next month! Woot! Seattle!

What? You want more? Fine. Just one more. For the kids.

We have, as previously reported, robot suits. FRICKIN' ROBOT SUITS!!! Iran has....well, Iran has these things. Tremble, Yankee Dogs. Tremble and weep.

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