Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The Morning Blog

I could be a responsible blogger and write something about the economic costs Egypt is facing due to the protests ($310 million a day...yeesh), but I haven't had my coffee yet and aw hell...I'm gonna be a poplulist and go into this thing about Lindsay Lohan facing felony charges for stealing a $2,500 necklace instead. Will her reign of terror never be stopped? What involvement do the Quaids have in this? Could this be another devious ploy by star whackers? The mind boggles.

Frankly, I'm more concerned about record high food prices and the Chinese drought. They're the worlds largest producer of grain and this is the worst drought they've had in 60 years. If they're forced to import grain, prices worldwide will climb even higher. Food prices have been cited as one of the instigating factors for the Egyptian and Tunisian protests.

Frankly, this headline is pretty alarming as well...Where's Dr. Evil when you need him?

North Korean military officials stomped out of talks with their South Korean counterparts after failing to even decide what they would be chatting about. I guess it's progress, I'll take a temper tantrum over an artillery shelling any day.

I would think that pilots should include checking for "screams and thumps" as part of their pre-flight check.

Theresa Bait: Southern cooking?

Well...This is Southwestern Pennsylvania for you: A man apparently armed with an arsenal of firearms has been accused of resorting to biting FBI agents.

Meanwhile, this was probably not the most effective get-away plan.

Sue Bait: Presenting the iPriest.

Did not expect to say this but: Hey, thanks Tea Party! Some of y'all anyways. Way to stand up for the Bill of Rights!

The first person to receive the Medal of Honor for action in Iraq or Afghanistan has chosen to not re-enlist. I think that's understandable. He received the award for charging directly into an ambush in order to rescue three American soldiers. Heroic? Absolutely. Terrible day at the job and something you probably wouldn't want to repeat? Oh, you bet!

In the wake of the uprisings in the Middle East, intelligence agencies are taking a very keen interest in social networking sites like Twitter and Facebook. Which is certainly not surprising at all. What's going to be awesome is to watch is how quickly technologists find ways to circumvent government intrusiveness in order to mobilize protest safely and anonymously. The can of worms is open.

Pirates, more pirates and the Egyptian navy would be helpful right about now.

Iran combats obscenity by behaving obscenely. I think that it goes without saying, that an execution is far more perverse than any picture of sex could hope to be.

Seems back alley buttock injections have claimed yet another tragic death.

Kacee Bait: Baby, maybe we should start playing the lottery more?

The GOP soldiers on and keeps government out of your pocketbook and firmly ensconced in your uterus. This is what HR 3 means:

But going after the tax code could cause all kinds of confusion, testified George Washington University law professor Sara Rosenbaum. For example, she said, the IRS would have to make technical decisions about what types of abortions can and can't be covered so it can decide what kind of insurance is eligible for tax deductions and credits.

"We're going to need the Internal Revenue Service to define a rape; potentially a forcible rape, incest; potentially incest involving minors; as opposed to incest not involving minors; physical conditions endangering life, and physical conditions that don't endanger life," she said.

Here's a very polite man sticking a gun in someones face. My first thought was "Aw, this guy is a victim of the economy and he doesn't want to be in this situation". But then I noticed, after apologizing profusely for threatening someone with a gun and listing the unfortunate reasons he was compelled to do so, he has the presence of mind to calmly take the cup of coffee he purchased with him.


Here is your Very, Very Bad Idea for the Day. Have these people never seen "Jaws II"?

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